nostalgia has been killed...

And I don't really intend on solving this mystery.

Haven't slept a wink for the past 44 hours. Interesting effect it has. I'm not really sleepy, though I do find myself dozing off at particularly relaxing moments. But it's never deep enough to be considered sleep. Can still hear people talking and stuff. And everything seems to be a shade darker or something. It seems caffein finally has an effect on me. Amazing. Ergh.

Today, there was a gathering for Ratna's going off to the land of frozen corpses and vodka. Both are unrelated, and intricately intwined. Vodka keeps the people warm enough to avoid being turned into a corpse, and too much vodka leads them to do crazy things in the snow that will turn them into a corpse. Must say it was an interesting thought.

Spent the morning with Evon. Breakfast was chee cheong fun the way I used to have when I was about 8. Walked around a bit, then headed over to MidValley. When people started coming, I realised how little I missed their company. Or how little they missed mine. Did that make me feel sad, angry, depressed? Not that I would feel so. I feel hollow. It's like I've always known, and I don't miss my past in the slightest bit. Why should I?

Nostalgia has been killed. I do not miss my past, I sometimes even hate it. But I think I'm beginning to enjoy the present a lot more. Last night was good. Drinking tea with people is relaxing, and helps put life into perspective. At least, in what manner of perspective possible.

Touch is such an important thing. How much it must suck to be a naked mole rat. They have the lack of a chemical in their skin called substance P. This kind of inocculates them against pain. And they can't feel very much of anything. If a certain situation had been similar in case for me, I think I would have killed myself from depression. What was it that required such a sense as touch? Let's just say that I think I may have the beginnings of an ulcer on my top lip from what we were doing.

I have a few pics to upload. But I'm too lazy. And the shades of grey that colour the life of one sleep deprived does not help in the slightest in photo editing. Don't expect an update soon. I'll be headed for the Ninth State. My mom's birthday and her twin's (duh), and then my cousin's the day after. Will be spending some time on the beach tomorrow, which in itself is bloody weird because I'm fat and ugly and not worth giving two looks at, so I'll probably be combing the area for photographable things/persons and try to avoid too obvious tan lines. I hate those.

Out.