girls...

If there's any cause for the downfall of a great guy, it's a woman. They're probably the most incomprehensible, ridiculous things ever. That said, we're probably more ridiculous for needing them.

The biggest headaches are female. Is it any wonder why they name the worst hurricanes after them? In the most obvious case of humans mimicking nature, the guy who came up with that idea was an utter genius.

This evening, I spent the day with two lovely ladies. Two ladies that are right now making me wish that humans reproduced by asexual cell division. Not that I have any romantic interest in them. No. It is more like the very fact that they are female, and that they were displaying typically female social traits that makes me feel that it would be better off if we had spore caps rather than balls.

Female politics are a total ass fucking when you're a guy. If you laugh at the things they say, you're insensitive. If you agree with what they say, they'll yell at you for making fun of them. And if you give a totally logical opinion, they'll mock you for your stupidity. And the most obvious answer is the last thing on their minds.

If you get to know a girl, you'll notice that they tend to fit easier into the social strata than you do. That's because, by some absurd twist of fate, social behaviour is somehow engineered to fit with the way girls do things. All that social grooming and gossiping and what-have-yous. The male ideal is seen as anti-social. So frustrating.

Another thing, although not exclusively female, but more prevalent in females than males, is the tendency to lump groups of people together. Girls, particularly, seem to enjoy treating people according to the company they keep. Guys tend to be less judgemental. Ape gila sial perempuan...

As romantic prospects, girls pose a serious complication. Either they'll make you broke, or wish you were. You can't win. If you don't buy an appropriate gift (more often than not expensive) you'll be killed. If you do, you'll be broke. Hell, not only must it be pricey, it must also be meaningful. Argh! Sometimes, they'd rather you do it by hand rather than buy it. In which case, be prepared to spend a hell lot of time as well as money. Any less than that and they'll accuse you of not loving them enough. Valentine's day. Haha!

So why do we bother? Yeah, there's the whole girl thing; they're nice to hold, nice to cuddle, nice to have pamper you, nice to say sweet nothings to, nice to kiss. There's that. And then, there's Brokeback Mountain.