merde-eka...

Merde is French for shit. Or damn. I think. At least, it's used as an expression of annoyance. And here I sit, exactly half an hour away from the 48th birthday of the titular endowment of this ground, with a half baked lab report waiting for me. I know not what I'm doing. At any rate, I'm pretty much emotionless enough for me to talk on the following topic with much amusement. To myself at least.

The country's about 48 years old I think. Yeah. Something like that. I don't really recall. Anyways, it's well about the time of a midlife, which kinda explains the midlife crisis this place has been going through, though arguably the process has been running for the past 20 or so years. Mostly, the society is beginning to show signs of maturity, as in age, not mannerisms. Well, they're starting to act like some cooped up old crones with anal-deficient nurses. What do I mean? Good question.

Society is becoming very self righteous, not to say that it wasn't already in the first place. But more so than ever now. Each group believes that it has a sovereign right to say anything it likes. Seems that Malaysian society has reached a critical point, where people are becoming a bunch of uptight halfwits who drive like they had eyes on their kneecaps. People should not wear jeans, in that case. Everyone's become so accusing (much like me), everyone else is to blame for your own problems, which I cannot help but agree. I mean, who's the one causing all my problems? Definitely not me! Why'd I be so stupid to do that? Isn't that right?

Another clue is the knee-jerk reaction to every God-forsaken thing that manages to make its way into mainstream media. Oh, a rape case. Let's chemically castrate all males above the age of 12 so that they won't feel like fucking every other girl who waves her left breast in public. Or interestingly, let's abolish Approved Permits cuz they're causing Iron Lady Rafidah Aziz to rust. Or the classic: let's have National Service because our education system admittedly sucks and the kids are unpatriotic and we have no idea why and they're also hooligans cuz they're not mindlessly serving their 'elders' and also I need more money to build my hilltop villa so let's siphon money from the Treasury on pretext of designing this program and most importantly we must have such a program because other countries have it though we have no real idea what they do in it and what they have it for. Sign of midlife crisis? Obviously.

Perhaps an even fairer comparison would be to compare kids here with kids everywhere else. Besides, as the most favourite-est statement of any politician wishing to point the blame on young people, "they're our nation's future leaders!" Let's see. Kids here are spoilt and selfish and boring and fat and rude and not to mention fat because we pamper them too much. Let's run down their self esteem by writing about it in the newspapers and hope that we're right and they're too stupid to read it. Overseas kids are a lot more polite, especially those starving kids in Africa and Ethiopia, where they're too fucking starved to rebel and make trouble for us older people. Indeed. It's much better having undead rather than kids who can think. Yeah, sometimes they're good kids, but mostly they're just retards, from no fault of ours. After all, we're older, and apparently wiser, so we couldn't possibly have made a mistake. No, let's blame it on their personalities and call it a day.

Maybe we should point out how lucky that independence was achieved through bloodless means, and is maintained by all races fairly and equally. Yeah, it's such a fantastic feat. We took the money from our stupid Malay relatives to go to some tea party in London and in return we screw them royally by making some 'protection' scheme for them that seems to be extremely beneficial but actually renders them all secretly sterile by quietly making them dependant on us! Haha. Fools. And those bastard Cinas. They're so good at making money, we just tax them, and use all that nice nice money to make pointless monuments to our equally fantastic stupidity. And let's not forget our Indian friends. They need jobs since they came from such a poor country. Why not put them in plantations to work, barely above the poverty line, which is better than below the line, what! Oh, and take all their SMART children, teach them nonsense in law schools and medical schools, then we put them under conscription, but not official lar, in government service and whatnot. Good what! They got jobs!

Aiyar, let's also not forget our mat salleh kawans. We lure them here, pretending to be all polite, smiling at them at the same time we're picking their pockets. And we can't stop at that. We also con them into thinking this is a very racially harmonious place, so definitely no race issues. No. Unless you're orang putih. That one, cannot gerenti, okay?

Happy Merdeka Day, dudes.

Jin out.