It's strange how I never have anything to say, but so much to write. I'm a really bad person to see up close. I have terrible skin, I look quite fat and dumpy (which is augmented while wearing yellow, cuz then I look like a big yellow lemon), I'm loud and obnoxious, and I have very very bad habits, that will lead to appearing very crude and unrefined. To top that off, I am told I have a ver condescending tone, as well as coming across as arrogant. Wow. I am THAT fascinating.
Now the trick is, how the hell should I sell myself as a person? Yeah, I already have a girl (I love you, Wen!), but if I were to sell myself like I was a product, I'd have to show off all the good points, and if possible render the bad points irrelevant. The problem being now is that I have very few good traits, if at all, to sell, and many many many bad ones to cover, or render unimportant. Tricky tricky, but I need to do this if I'm to get a job.
Take a good view, and the bad points will pounce on you like a horny chihuahua on Viagra. Damn, those little buggers can go on and on and on. First off, like I said, I'm fat. Like seriously. That would imply very little care for myself, and also a distinct lazy streak. Not to mention physically incompetant. Not a good worker, for one thing, laziness. Another trait that's gonna really screw the sale is my unkempt appearance. I look like some sort of refuge camp inmate, quite often. And the dry hair just fucks it all up. My clothes are mostly passe, which states my taste as being fairly bad. Likewise, my hair's all lala, also a bad indicator of fashion sense. Poor skin condition, aggravated by genetics, fucks up the appearance category. My parents say I look like a leprosy victim. Ergh. Now to the mental defects. I'm arrogant, and condescending. Many people can vouch for that. Just ask around. I have no tact, very little smarts, less wisdom, no intelligence. All three states of mental perfection all fucked. How wonderful is that? Oh, my physical as well as mental coordination is all out. It's like I'm some retard or something. Oh oh, let's also not forget my absolute inability to be romantic. Which is amplified by my absolute lack of money with which to even attempt to remedy that. It's too bad this page is in a very very public domain populated by people who know me, if not I would talk about my sexual deficiencies too. Lolz, just pulling some legs there.
Now the positive part. *crickets in the background* Woaho. Nothing? Can't you people give me even one? No? You know what? I'm gonna lie face down on the floor now and cry. The truth hurts. It sears and burns us... Why doesss the fat hobbitssess hatessss usss? Ergh. Okay, okay, seriousness. I can bake. At least ONE person I know finds guys who can cook at all attractive. Also, apparently an ability to write poetry is attractive too. Too bad I don't actually know what my poems mean. Hmm, music? Well, I do play the piano, but it is hampered by my lack of physical coordination. A retard, that's what I am. My big fat body is useful for carrying stuff apparently. That seems to be a practical use for me. Not too bad. And also, I can carry heavy stuff to. Did I mention I can carry heavy things? Oh. I did. Crap. Now I have nothing left to say. *more crickets* Malaikat lalu. Or in other words, fat man passing through. Ah yes, got one more thing to say, I'm good at crapping even when there's nothing worth talking about. And it will sound sensible, unlike when I talk like I normally do. Hmm.
In comparison, I'd say I am deep within the red zone, red being a dangerous color, because it attracts attention and is therefore most likely to be a color used to indicate danger. Mwahaha! I suppose this is why females confuse me. At least one of their number can effectively find me attractive, and manage to seduce me (lusty lusty insaniac on the loose!), turning my world upside down, making me happy with myself for the first time in my life, making life worth living (at least meanwhile), and actually loving me for all that crap. Incredible. If it weren't such a good feeling, I'd have her locked up in some hospital for insanity, then bludgeon myself to death with a miniature sattelite dish just so that no other female could make that same mistake again. Mwahahaha! Sigh, this is what happens when you don't go to sleep before 10. Going insane. Wen's gonna kill me. I wish she would. Then she would be free from my evil influnce. Mehness.
I'm crying. For some reason, my eyes are tearing. Can't control it. Probably something wrong with my brain, not there wasn't any problems in the first place. Hmm, thinking of getting a piercing tomorrow. I wonder if a piercing in the nether regions would clear all this fog up. I wonder if they do it here at all. Maybe I should try one myself. Pray for me. Hope I don't botch up an ampallang, lolz. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, don't worry. I'm rambling on and on about something I don't have the guts (cuz I'm missing an appendix, lolz) to try. As it is, my lips burn for the touch of hers. Eew, Jin is being so disgusting... I can feel that emanate through your minds. Like, whateverrrr...
Hmm, it's strange. This post is still a lot shorter than what I normally write. I think it's about 1000 words long. Or rather, one thousand words short. Fuckness. This lack of seeing Wen is really driving me nuts. Damn it, I'm male, I'm young, and while I may be mentally different and retarded in every other way, I still have urges. Like urges to see her. Naked. You didn't see that. Argh. Sleep deprivation keeps my mind dead. It always was. I wonder how this post would look like after it goes through the editing department of the Star. Hmm. Mehness.
I love Wen! Jin out.
